The Feeling I Dislike the Most

For several years I have suffered from migraines. They have progressively worsened over the past few years. They are excruciating and debilitating. However, this is not the feeling I dislike most. Most recently I have felt the many discomforts that accompany pregnancy including but not limited to sciatica, heartburn, leg and foot cramps, and swollen feet. Yet these are not the feelings I dislike most. I have experienced natural childbirth three times. But again, this is not the feeling I dislike most. The feeling I dislike most is not necessarily physical though the effect causes a terrible physical anxiety. The feeling I dislike most is being lost. With almost every discomfort or pain, you know there is an end somewhere in sight. However, with being lost, you never know when you’re going to be found or find your way out. There is a helplessness in not being in control.

I can recall several times I have been lost. The life-changing one was a few years ago after we moved to Ohio. I was trying to take the kids to school on their first day of school. My normal route was closed, but I was sure I knew an alternative route. (Keep in mind the school is nine twisty miles from our house.) Twenty minutes later when still no streets were looking familiar and the kids were ten minutes late for school we crossed a county line into a city I knew was clearly not where I wanted to be. I phoned Dano in our “emergency calling” code. He asked what my whereabouts were. Being a not-so-sunny day, all I could tell him was what town we were in and that there were fields on both sides of us. Skipping to the end: the kids eventually made it to school, the secretary answered my disheveled look with an understanding smile, and a week later Dano brought home a gift…my very own GPS! Life-changing indeed! (I had previously told him I didn’t need one…kind of like I had told him a couple years before that I didn’t need a minivan.) That little darling that sits atop my dash has kept me on the right path ever since.

So, what do you do when you’re lost and not in the car? Our trek back to Jeddah began with a stop in Washington, D.C. Dano had meetings in West Virginia so the kids and I were going to stay with my sister for a few days. So conveniently fun! On our way to drop Dano off in West Virginia, we had a little extra time so we decided to stop at Harper’s Ferry. Kennedy had been there with her leadership conference back in April and was anxious to have us visit. We followed the park ranger’s suggestion of going down to Lower Town. However, she failed to tell us there was a shuttle to Lower Town. We found the hiking trail pointing to Lower Town and with Abby on Dano’s back in the carrier, we set off on the park-labeled “vigorous” hike. The scenery was beautiful. The hike was steep with wonderful shale rock everywhere.We reached the bottom of the hill with no sight of Lower Town. We crossed the highway and picked up the faint trail. It led us to a serene river. Then the trail seemed to disappear. We forged our own trail, every now and then finding hints of what could be the actual trail. After about twenty minutes more of walking we decided we’d fare better if we followed the train tracks. Surely they would lead to the town. We walked on the railroad tracks listening intently for any oncoming trains. I could envision the whistle blowing and our family dodging off the tracks, rolling down the gravel toward the river. It seems so many of my images come from what I’d find in a movie!
We could see the highway up a hill of trees and brush to our left but there was no shoulder on which to walk and surely no one would pick up six hitchhikers! So on we blazed. At this point we’d been hiking for well over an hour with no end in sight. That terrible feeling of being lost began to set in. Finally after a family prayer and some divine intervention we decided to go ahead and leave the train tracks and head to the road. Where we had decided to pick up on the road happened to be shortly after a walkway beside the road had begun. We followed it, with many looks from drivers, for about another half a mile until we reached Lower Town.

Along the way we passed the remains of a pulp mill from the late 1800s and a wonderful old wooden truss bridge used for access to factories or to escape from floods.
Lower Town led to a point where Virginia, West Virginia, and Maryland all meet at the convergence of the Potomac and Shenandoah Rivers.
Unfortunately after two hours and two miles of hiking we were all too pooped and sore (and out of time) to tour much around Harper’s Ferry. Kennedy gave us the condensed historical significance and we headed toward the shuttle, the glorious shuttle!

Speaking of this time of being lost, at least we were lost together as a family, the scenery was beautiful, and we’d been taught what the best thing is to do when you’re lost. We know that Heavenly Father always knows the way out if we just ask. He’ll direct us.